my life as a verb

living outside of the united states of america has bestowed upon me the gift of an ever-widening, ever-changing perspective; personal, political, spiritual, global - the whole shebang. my life is feeling very much these days like a verb. so much is in motion...transforming, shifting, bubbling up inside and out....yet amidst the movement there is a daily steadiness that i don't remember ever feeling in my adult life. it often comes to me as the image and quality of a stone buddha, sitting at my back....as part of me and also behind me supporting my spine....a solid presence i can access AND lean into. it's a profound difference from feeling like i'm being tossed upon the waves, flailing in every direction....nowhere to anchor when the storm hits, even my breath lost to me.....not sure where i'm going and certainly not sure about where i am. nowadays, it doesn't feel even remotely as pressing to figure out exactly where i'm going. i definitely know where i am and that being here in korea, in this particular situation, is the ideal place for me to be at this time. the stormy seas have passed. and actually, i have discovered a calm, quiet pool to reside in for awhile....it is here that i am learning how to breathe....to anchor in those quiet waves that are always with me.

photograph: borobudur stone buddha statue on the island of java